OT: HUMOR Klingon Coding Practices 
Author Message
 OT: HUMOR Klingon Coding Practices

This is one of my all-time favorites:

http://www.*-*-*.com/

Top 12 things likely to be overheard if you had a Klingon Programmer

12) "Specifications are for the weak and timid!"

11) "This machine is a piece of GAGH! I need dual Pentium processors
if I am to do battle with this code!"

10) "You cannot really appreciate Dilbert unless you've read it in the
original Klingon."

 9) "Indentation?! - I will show you how to indent when I indent your
skull!"

 8) "What is this talk of 'release'?  Klingons do not make software
'releases'.  Our software 'escapes' leaving a {*filter*}y trail of
designers and quality assurance people in it's wake."

 7) "Klingon function calls do not have 'parameters' - they have
'arguments' - and they ALWAYS WIN THEM."

 6) "Debugging? Klingons do not debug. Our software does not coddle
the weak."

 5) "I have challenged the entire quality assurance team to a Bat-Leth
contest. They will not concern us again."

 4) "A TRUE Klingon Warrior does not comment his code!"

 3) "By filing this bug report you have challenged the honor of my
family.  Prepare to die!"

 2) "You question the worthiness of my code? I should kill you where
you stand!"

 1) "Our users will know fear and cower before our software! Ship it!
Ship it and let them flee like the dogs they are!"



Sun, 29 May 2005 09:12:42 GMT  
 OT: HUMOR Klingon Coding Practices


Wed, 18 Jun 1902 08:00:00 GMT  
 OT: HUMOR Klingon Coding Practices
BAH! Dishonor us again, human... And I will see YOU on the battle field!

--
Thanks,
Billy

Quote:
> This is one of my all-time favorites:

> http://www.*-*-*.com/

> Top 12 things likely to be overheard if you had a Klingon Programmer

> 12) "Specifications are for the weak and timid!"

> 11) "This machine is a piece of GAGH! I need dual Pentium processors
> if I am to do battle with this code!"

> 10) "You cannot really appreciate Dilbert unless you've read it in the
> original Klingon."

>  9) "Indentation?! - I will show you how to indent when I indent your
> skull!"

>  8) "What is this talk of 'release'?  Klingons do not make software
> 'releases'.  Our software 'escapes' leaving a {*filter*}y trail of
> designers and quality assurance people in it's wake."

>  7) "Klingon function calls do not have 'parameters' - they have
> 'arguments' - and they ALWAYS WIN THEM."

>  6) "Debugging? Klingons do not debug. Our software does not coddle
> the weak."

>  5) "I have challenged the entire quality assurance team to a Bat-Leth
> contest. They will not concern us again."

>  4) "A TRUE Klingon Warrior does not comment his code!"

>  3) "By filing this bug report you have challenged the honor of my
> family.  Prepare to die!"

>  2) "You question the worthiness of my code? I should kill you where
> you stand!"

>  1) "Our users will know fear and cower before our software! Ship it!
> Ship it and let them flee like the dogs they are!"



Sun, 29 May 2005 16:29:30 GMT  
 
 [ 3 post ] 

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